I'm living on a landmine, my body's ticking away
My cartoon eyelids and my skin, a sickly grey
And if I waited by the phone line, I'd wait a couple of days
So I'm here lying on my bed, until I fade
I flick the channels one to one, I flick them through again
And all the time I'm dreaming better days

And now (I see no sun, I see no light behind my one-track mind)
Here I (need no fun, I need no time to find a new design)
Move along, I'm working on my 3D TV tan
So-so KO - I need another show
So-so KO - it's just a part of the plan
So-so KO - there's only me and my TV tan

Someday maybe I'll call you, I'll see whenever I'm free
Maybe Tuesday when there's nothing on TV
Twenty Regal and a four-pack, I guess I'm set for the night
And antisocial to keep in shape, thin and white
I like to smoke and in 'tween tokes, consult the TV guide
The bible for the pig who stays inside

And now (I see no sun, I see no light behind my one-track mind)
Here I (need no fun, I need no time to find a new design)
Move along, I'm working on my 3D TV tan
So-so KO - I need another show
So-so KO - it's just a part of the plan
So-so KO - there's only me and my TV tan
TV tan

Thinning, I'm thinning and insanely grinning
As fools peering out of my TV try hard to be funny
Unfortunate for me they start to entertain me

I'm living on a landmine, the kind that never ignites
And I'm here waiting here for nothing

And now (I see no sun, I see no light behind my one-track mind)
Here I (need no fun, I need no time to find a new design)
Move along, I'm working on my 3D TV Tan
So-so KO - I need another show
So-so KO - it's just a part of the plan
So-so KO - there's only me and my TV Tan